My Boys

I had promised Andy that we would wait a year before we would try to have children. Of course, from the moment we were married, all I wanted was to get pregnant. We had paid for our wedding in cash and we were working on paying off all of our bills. I had calculated that if we paid off our credit card and both cars, I would be able to be a stay-at-home mom. I had figured that it would take about a year to do so. But then, we found out that our friends were pregnant. I was SO happy for David and Kelly, but so insanely jealous at the same time. Andy’s reaction was, “Don’t touch Kelly. It might be contagious!” Needless to say, that comment upset me and sparked a debate…and Andy slept on the couch that night. It wasn’t too long after that when Andy came to me to talk. He had just turned 30 and he had a change of heart. He said that he felt like now that he was 30, he was ready to grow up and let go of his childhood. Nothing could have made me happier and I stopped taking the pill that night! It took 3 months of trying, but on December 21, 2006, I went to the OB/GYN for what I thought was a UTI and found out that I was pregnant!!! It was the best Christmas present I could have gotten!

I kept a pregnancy journal during my pregnancies and I hope to post them here later. At 36 weeks and 2 days gestation, my water broke and I was subsequently induced. Gavin was born on August 6, 2007 at 5:30. He was 7 lbx. 14 oz. and 19 1/2 inches long. He has brought me so much joy and I regret not having started a journal at that time to keep a record of his infancy. I was on maternity leave for 12 weeks and loved being home with him. It broke my heart to go back to work on October 31, 2007. At that point, we had our credit card and one of our vehicles paid off. We had decided that, at that time, I would need to work full-time at nurse pay and Andy would go part-time. Andy had interviewed and oriented for a 1/2 EMS, 1/2 Vitalink position that never materialized, but he was able to go PRN at Vitalink. This way, we made enough money to pay the bills and to continue to pay off the van, and we wouldn’t have to pay for daycare. It only took about 3 months to pay off the van and I quickly decided that I wanted to be the stay-home parent. Andy agreed! I approached my director and chief about a 0.1 part-time (PRN) position. Up to that point, no one had been PRN at Airlink/Vitalink without having a full-time position elsewhere in the hospital, so they had to create a position for me. It took about 2 more months, but I finally went PRN and Andy took a full-time position with Vitalink. I think that the best thing that ever happened was Andy experiencing what it was like being the stay-home parent. Now he totally understands and appreciates how hard it is to raise the kids and be at home.

I really enjoyed staying home. I breast fed and made my own baby food. I joined a mommies group and went to playdates. I just loved being a mommy…so much that we planned to try to get pregnant again when Gavin was a year old. To our surprise, the moment I stopped breastfeeding Gavin, at around 10 1/2 months old, I got pregnant again without even trying. I surprised Andy when he got home from work. Gavin was wearing a t-shirt that said, “I’m going to be a big brother.” I wasn’t sure exactly how Andy would react since we hadn’t planned to get pregnant that soon, but his mouth dropped open and his eyes got teary. He smiled and said, “You’re pregnant? Awesome!”

We would have been due on March 15, 2009, but on 08/08/08, the day of our first ultrasound, we found out that the pregnancy had resulted in a blighted ovum. There was a sac, a placenta, but no baby. I was devastated, to say the least. I had a D&C a week later. We tried again for 2 months without success and I was getting really depressed. Before the miscarriage, I had lost down to 149 lbs. I gained 10 pounds while I was pregnant and gained 13 more pounds after the miscarriage, so I was up to 172. We had originally planned to go to Key Largo in October as a “babymoon”, but now, I was a fat, depressed slob who didn’t even want to be seen in a bathing suit. Well, I was able to relax, get happy, and enjoy myself on vacation and, happily, came home pregnant! I found out on November 1, 2008. I was so excited and so scared. Scared to death for the first 20 weeks or so. But on July 7, 2009, at 39 weeks gestation, Colin was born by c-section at 10:02 am. He was 10 lbs. 4 oz. and 22 inches long. WOW, what a big boy! Now, when I think back to my second pregnancy, since there was a pregnancy but no baby, I feel like it was Colin trying to get here, but he just misfired. From the moment I found out we had lost him, I did everything in my power to get him back. And now he’s finally here and almost 6 months old.

My boys are my world. Andy, Gavin, and Colin are the most important people in my life and I live everyday for them.